Calamity, Catastrophy and chaos.

That, I have decided, is what little boys are really made of.

 

This last month has been one trip to the ER after another. My insurance company claim agent has got to be sitting at his desk, scratching his head at it all. My youngest started out the month with a sudden mystery rash that, to this day, we have not figured out what he came into contact with. Home remedies were a no go, and it decided to go nuclear and start surrounding his eye on a weekend when, of course, the doctors office was closed. So off  to the ER he went. One week later, and the steroid they gave him didn’t work. Off to the doctors office, and another week of steroids finally does some good.

Towards the end of his second week, he started having pressure on his chest like ‘a car was on it.’ On a weekend. Again. So off to the ER, aaaagain, and they find nothing. We suspect it was a well played distractionary tactic to avoid homework.

At school the following day, he is playing with a girl in his class, and they fall at the same time, and somehow she falls knee first on his head. He calls from the school to tell me the fall broke his glasses, and he is sporting a new lovely, bleeding goose egg at his brow.  Siiiggghhh. So off to the eye place we go for repairs.

Two days later he spikes a fever, and his throat,  head and neck hurts terribly, and he is very congested. I think, strep (he is a carrier). Its a weekend, because this kid can NEVER get sick during doctors office hours. Soooo..you guessed it! BACK to the ER we go. They did a strep and flu test, both negative.  They give him an antibiotic, but don’t know what is wrong, The doc was guessing a sinus infection. Guessing. Awesome.  Lets just play roll the medical dice.

He takes a couple of doses of the antibiotic, which he has taken in the past, and starts to feel better. After about dose four, he breaks out in ANOTHER rash! By this point I am thinking there is something really wrong here. He goes to a Children’s hospital ER this time, and they tell us that the antibiotic he is taking for unknown reasons, is causing an allergic reaction, and seem as confused as I did as to the WHY he was prescribed anything at all.

Really? Really.

So fast forward about a week, and THAT boy is doing well. He and my oldest are playing at my mothers house, running around doing crazy boy stuff, when my oldest son gets his foot caught, spins as he falls and hears a horrible cracking noise.

Insert exasperated noise and facepalm here….

So now HE goes to the ER, and they say its just a sprain, and to keep it wrapped, elevated and iced. Should be better in a couple days.

Nope. Of course not. That’s just not how it goes for my household.

I ended up taking him to an orthopedist two days later, and he came home with a knee high boot and the diagnosis of a torn ligament.

Wonderful.

Now he is hobbling along in this boot, trying to navigate the crowded halls of his high school as I type this. Poor kid, his ankle is killing him, and he still has to go to school.

At this point, I’m pretty sure I have phone PTSD, because every time my phone rings, I jump, just waiting for another call saying one of them did something to themselves.

They had better remember all of this when I am old!